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More Zombie Sightings

Cow-orkers and I walked down to The Water Garden for lunch - there's a Subway there for cheap lunch and a nice view. Through the smoked glass of the doors to the interior, I saw a bunch of cops piling onto one poor unfortunate. I couldn't make out details, but I could tell that the cops weren't having much luck - they'd grab him, wrestle him down, and then a few seconds later he'd be up on his feet again - grabbing them right back!

Perhaps he was a zombie, looking for spicy, succulent police brains? Send more cops! It got me to wondering about a couple of more zombie-related issues. What would I do if the ZA broke out while I was at work? This is actually a not-terrible place to hole up, at least temporarily. There's only one entranceway, and it would be pretty easily blocked. Provided we had water and food (and I've got a huge stash of protein bars) we could hold out quite a while, I think. Even better would be access to some kind of boat down at the marina though ... Catalina Island or even Hawaii? At any rate, away from land is away from zed!

But what would the legal rights of a zombie be? I mean, could we actually prove that they were undead? Would they have right to legal counsel? I imagine it wouldn't be hard to establish that they were not competent, but christ - does that mean that legally, zombies have to be released because they're not competent to stand trial? Egads... I suppose this would be the one and only circumstance in which President Bush's limitless power to detain anyone, anywhere, indefinitely without trial, process, or counsel would seem wise. Send the zombies to Guantanamo!

Huh, spooky. I just looked up the police report for the incident at the Water Garden - it's too soon for that one to be reported. But they are saying there's been some sort of band of derelicts in Santa Monica assaulting people and vandalizing property. I wonder if they shut down some methadone clinic or something, and suddenly there's a ton of angry, dope-sick hobos wandering around venting their spleens. It's zed! I know it! :)


( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
Jun. 13th, 2007 08:38 pm (UTC)
Hm, generally the dead do not have rights or standing. But the undead? Maybe a court would assign a lawyer to act on his behalf and look out for his legal and medical interests. I can see it now. "Your honor, my client petitions this court for an affirmative injunction regarding the food given to him in jail. Without a proper diet of grey matter, my client will surely starve!" Habeas corpus, indeed.
Jun. 13th, 2007 09:00 pm (UTC)
You know, I do believe that you have chanced upon your specialty! Zombie Law, a soon to be growth industry!
Jun. 13th, 2007 09:52 pm (UTC)
1) i think technically, if the zombies weren't competent to stand trial, their mental (!) status would have to be assessed and if necessary, they would instead be remanded to the custody of appropriate medical/mental health facilities with high security.

2) were you aware that it's blog like it's the end of the world day, or is this just a happy coincidence? you have had zombies on the brain recently... (pun not intentional, but highly appropriate)
Jun. 13th, 2007 09:54 pm (UTC)
Jun. 13th, 2007 10:56 pm (UTC)
That settles it. I'm up to 5 zombie lj postings showing on my friends page today. I draw the line at 5. I'm calling in favors. I'm calling in the ZAAT (Zombie Apocalypse Annihilation Team).
Jun. 13th, 2007 11:11 pm (UTC)
Just a side zombie comment...

I have 2 books by Max Brooks the zombie survival guide and World War Z. I also have them in audio and the second is particularly effective in the audio format. Anyways... i didn't realize that Max Brooks is Mel Brooks' son.

Ok that was total non-sequiter, my brain is fried...
Jun. 13th, 2007 11:12 pm (UTC)
I didn't realize that, either! (though I do have both books)
Jun. 22nd, 2007 06:07 am (UTC)
Only _1_ entrace way?
There is also the fire exit, which we use in fire drills.

Also, if you look carefully on the roof, there is a small room on top of our building. It's hard to see. Though, it proposes that there is another stairs shaft.

You better stick with me, when the zombies come :)
Jun. 22nd, 2007 01:58 pm (UTC)
Re: Only _1_ entrace way?
But the fire exit is reached through the same vestibule as the elevator, no? To be honest I've never used the fire exit, and don't actually know where it is. Which is a whole different problem from when the zombies come!

(by the way, this was from "Blog like it's the end of the world day" in which, across the internet, people pretended it was the Zombie Appocalypse.)
( 9 comments — Leave a comment )


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