Rum, Sodomy, and the Lash: Pick Two (aghrivaine) wrote,
Rum, Sodomy, and the Lash: Pick Two

The real problem

You know what the real problem with zombies is?

It's not that they're undead. It's not that they smell bad, or that they eat people, or that they roam the night in a shambling mockery of their prior lives.

No, the problem is that zombies eat brains. This means that they'd be more inclined to eat people with bigger brains.

I submit that if zombies wanted to eat people with small brains, that they would actually be a valuable socio-economic force in America. Zombies, rather than being seen as undead predators, would come to be seen as an important part of the cycle of life, and a priceless contribution to the quality of the human gene pool.

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