I implored one of the greedy women, who looked remarkably like Tilda Swinson, not to take the Ring, but to see it destroyed. I tried to convince her it would corrupt anyone. I grabbed her by the lapels and said, "Don't you understand? Tolkien wasn't a writer, he was an historian!"
I'm still laughing about that, now that I'm awake. Even asleep, I'm an overwrought geek.