November 20th, 2006

monkey pirate

Open Letter to the Free Press

Dear Free Press;

I do not care one jot or one tittle about the reproduction of celebrities. I don't care if they adopt, conceive, steal or parthenogenically reproduce their babies. If one of them manages to brew one up in a mad science experiment, then by all means, tell me about it so I can go find a mob and a passel of torches. Barring that - please stop. There are important things to report on that you're ignoring in favor of million-dollar pictures of celebrity protoplasm.

Knock it off.


P.S. I don't care about their weddings, either.
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    annoyed annoyed
monkey pirate

Take that, Baron Zemo

A while ago I got every single issue of The Avengers on DVD. (Marvel Comics, not the BBC series.)

Mostly, the stuff from the 60's is dreadful - The Wasp is a ridiculous, empty-headed boy-crazy bit of fluff, and Hank Pym a wildly misogynistic jerk. Iron Man can't utter a sentence without saying something about being "Transistor powered!" and Thor is ... well, I don't doubt he inspired Abba, you know? Even Captain America doesn't get off scot free - his obsession with Rick Brown and the rest of the "Teen Brigade" (who the Avengers send to fight super-villains fairly often) is unwholesome at best.

But sometimes, we get little glimpses of just why Cap is the coolest of all the super-heroes - and while he's delivering a smack-down to Baron Zemo, he utters a tirade that is worthy of here repeating: "I was adept at every form of hand-to-hand combat known to man while you wer stil safe in your laboratory, serving your Nazi masters! Where is your braggadocio NOW, Master of Evil?!! I still remember how you snered at you calle d Americans soft... timid...too spoiled to fight for freedom! You mocked free men! you boasted of your contempt for liberty!! Feel my GRIP, Zemo! it's the grip of a FREE MAN! [Hmm, Masonic hints?] Look into my eyes, tyrant! They're the eyes of a man who would DIE for liberty! The world must never again make the fatal error mistaking compassion for weakness!! And while I live, it WON'T!!!!"

It's important to note that while Cap is hollering about compassion, he's giving Zemo a mach two faceplant into the cement. Now that's American compassion right there - compassion for the world by thumping Nazis! I'm not sure how many Nazis are left, but I could definitely get behind a policy of a solid face-kick any time they forget just how brusque American compassion can be. Of course, most of them probably live in Michigan and listen to death-metal, but that doesn't really change my opinion even a little bit. It's about ideology, not ethnicity. See, if you despise an intolerant ideology you are not yourself intolerant - and if you then go on to roundly beat the ever livin' snot of proponents of that ideology, you're not a violent psychopath, but actually a champion of liberty!
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    giggly giggly


I want to thank all of my friends who have very generously offered me a place to go Thanksgiving evening.

I've decided that I'm going to concentrate on the giving part of the holiday though, (I already have way too much to be thankful for!) and spend the day volunteering at the West Side Thanksgiving Charity event. They still need donations and volunteers both Wed night and all day Thursday. They need all sorts of things like old clothing to cranberry sauce, to cooked turkeys, to boxes of handiwipes. If you want to donate or help out, give their hot line a call at (310) 394-3153.

On any given "family" holiday, I am always vastly happier doing some volunteer work than I am with a traditional service. I'm glad I stumbled across the event on Caroline on Crack's website.

I hope you all have a fantastic and loving holiday.
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    cheerful cheerful